


chasing down light in the indigo

by thatsformetoknow



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Insecure Lance, M/M, also getting together of course because i am gay, honestly just tiredTM lance, i will always be mad about the gameshow episode, shiro is a sweet boy, something i should have written a very long time ago, this is basically just shiro comforting lance afterwards
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2021-02-18 03:48:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21621334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatsformetoknow/pseuds/thatsformetoknow
Summary: “Lance?” It was Shiro’s voice. Lance looked at him warily as he came in, and Shiro offered him a warm smile.“Hey, Shiro,” Lance said heavily, plastering a smile onto his face. “What can I do for you?”“I just thought I’d come and check on you,” Shiro said and Lance pursed his lips.“Well… here I am,” he said with a shrug.“You’ve just… been quiet for a few days,” Shiro said, biting his lip. “Like… unusual for Lance quiet.”Shiro paid attention enough to know what was a usual state of loudness for Lance? Was he really that annoying?“I’m just tired,” Lance offered as an explanation, praying that Shiro would just take it and leave him alone.“Oh, I’m sure,” Shiro nodded. “I know the feeling, I think we all do.”“Yeah, I was thinking of putting Red on auto for a bit and having a nap, or something,” Lance said, offering him another excuse to leave.Come on, Shiro, just take it.“That sounds like a good idea,” Shiro said, still not moving. “Do you mind a little company for a while?”
Relationships: Lance/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 300





	chasing down light in the indigo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shadowrubyhime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowrubyhime/gifts).



Lance looked up in annoyance as he heard a knock on the outside of Red. She’d already opened up to let whoever it was out there inside before Lance could say anything about it. He’d purposefully asked to spend this portion of the journey alone, so why was someone coming in now? He didn’t want to be around anyone, and wanted to talk with anyone even less, and they were due to take off any minute, which meant that whoever it was he was going to be stuck with until they landed again. He really _really_ missed the castle. 

“Lance?” It was Shiro’s voice. Lance looked at him warily as he came in, and Shiro offered him a warm smile. 

“Hey, Shiro,” Lance said heavily, plastering a smile onto his face. “What can I do for you?”

“I just thought I’d come and check on you,” Shiro said and Lance pursed his lips. 

“Well… here I am,” he said with a shrug. 

“You’ve just… been quiet for a few days,” Shiro said, biting his lip. “Like… unusual for Lance quiet.”

Shiro paid attention enough to know what was a usual state of loudness for Lance? Was he really that annoying? 

“I’m just tired,” Lance offered as an explanation, praying that Shiro would just take it and leave him alone. 

“Oh, I’m sure,” Shiro nodded. “I know the feeling, I think we all do.”

“Yeah, I was thinking of putting Red on auto for a bit and having a nap, or something,” Lance said, offering him another excuse to leave. _Come on, Shiro, just take it._

“That sounds like a good idea,” Shiro said, still not moving. “Do you mind a little company for a while?”

Lance blinked at him. “No,” he sighed, unable to find it in himself to snap at Shiro to just fuck off. 

Shiro smiled in return, gesturing to his control panel, and Lance looked up, watching as the other lions started to get restless and Lance could hear static on the comms. 

“Right, let’s go,” Keith’s voice sounded, and Lance blew out a breath as he followed in suit, taking off and keeping in their formation as the lions took to the sky.

Well, that was that, then; he was stuck with Shiro whether he liked it or not. He could always call Keith in here with his wolf to teleport him out if worst came to the worst, but… Lance didn’t want to cause a fuss. Shiro was still looking at him expectantly when he looked back, so he dutifully put Red on auto and got out of the pilots chair, moving to stand next to Shiro. 

It wasn’t a good idea to go down into her chamber this early on in the flight, so the two sat against the wall together, Lance waiting for Shiro to say something - he knew he’d come in here for a reason, so he wished he’d just come out and say it, instead of dancing around it like this. 

“Lance…” Shiro started after a few long quiet moments. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Lance shrugged, looking at Shiro like he’d missed something. 

Shiro sighed and Lance clenched his jaw. “Lance, come on. You’ve been off ever since you all… went to that game show place, and you know it. What happened?”

Lance looked down. Shiro was right, of course. Of course he was right; Shiro was perfect. He wasn’t their leader for nothing. Or… Keith was their leader now, but they were sort of sharing the role. 

“I’ll get over it,” Lance said, not looking up at him. “I don’t know why you couldn’t have come and asked this earlier, now you’re going to be _stuck with me_ until we land again.”

“Stuck with you?” Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow and Lance shrugged. 

“Yeah, wouldn’t want you to be stuck with me,” he said bitterly. “But you are. Still, better you than Keith though, right? He’s a crappy leader, I go to him once with my problems and he fucks off for two goddamn years, I guess he didn’t want to be stuck with me then, either.”

“Lance, what are you talking about?” Shiro asked, clearly confused. 

Lance sighed and looked at him. “We were asked to pick who out of the team we’d want to get to leave, and the rest were going to be trapped for eternity. I, for some goddamn reason picked Keith and made an utter fool of myself by saying some sappy shit about him, and then he goes and says “I just don’t wanna be stuck with Lance for the rest of eternity”, but I guess that’s fine, it’s not like I could’ve made a bigger fool of myself, anyway.”

Shiro frowned deeply. “Keith… said that?” he asked and Lance nodded. “Keith’s… not good with words, Lance, he couldn’t have meant it so bluntly like that, he cares about you.”

“Sure,” Lance said easily. “I’m sure he does. I’m sure you all do,” he shrugged. “Still, whatever that… thing was…” he sighed. “It wasn’t fair. There were four rounds and the first one Keith got to do with us, and we all did as a team, and the last one Pidge completely fucked up and still got out of it anyway, and then… the middle two? Just me, by myself, “the dumb one”, and the first time I nearly got fed to some… creature and the second time I nearly got cooked alive in this green slime. I guess that was what I deserved for being so fucking awful, huh?”

When he looked up Shiro was looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face. “The dumb one?”

“Sure, that’s what everyone kept calling me. That’s what the audience kept laughing over, and I just kept proving them right question after question, so I guess it’s whatever. Keith was right to not want to be stuck with me for eternity.”

“Lance…” Shiro said gently, but Lance didn’t let him finish, sighing heavily and shaking his head. 

“I’m useless. I was useless then, and that drove Keith to leave and I’m useless now, and somehow I get to sit here and you don’t and it’s not fair. Allura never should’ve brought me back, because then there’d be the right number of paladins again.”

“Lance,” Shiro said, voice low. “What do you mean… brought you back?”

Lance clenched and unclenched his jaw a few times. “I didn’t think she’d told anyone, but sometimes I just figured that she did, and no one knew what to say, or no one cared to say anything if they did. I shouldn’t be complaining though, right? I mean, you’ve been through it, I guess.”

“Been through what?”

“You died, didn’t you? You died and your consciousness was stored in the black lion?”

“I- yes,” Shiro said uneasily. “But what does that have to do with-?”

“I died,” Lance said, cutting him off and looking down. “I died,” he repeated, a little more firmly. 

“You- _what_?” Shiro asked, clearly horrified, and Lance knew deep down that none of them had known. It had been all too easy to pretend that they had, though. “W...When?”

“The omega shield,” Lance said with a small shrug. “The plates started breaking apart and they were firing things, and… I just- I just jumped in front of Allura, I didn’t have time to think about it, she would’ve died, and she’s more valuable than me, I couldn’t… I couldn’t let her…”

Shiro didn’t say anything for a very long moment, before slowly bringing his gaze up from the floor to meet Lance’s. “Lance, you are _so_ valuable,” he said, voice a shaky whisper.

Lance huffed, looking away. “Yeah, sure.”

“You are,” Shiro insisted. 

Lance flinched at the first touch of Shiro’s hand, shying away from it, but eventually let Shiro take his face in his hands, meeting his eyes, his own full of unshed tears at Shiro’s words. 

“I’m sorry that we’ve been too busy to see how much you’re hurting,” Shiro said softly. 

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters,” Shiro said, shaking his head. “You matter, Lance, you’re part of this- this family, and we love you, and we _need_ you, and if you had’ve… if you had’ve stayed dead, then none of us would have recovered, you _have_ to know that.”

Lance didn’t say anything and Shiro looked down, gently stroking his thumbs along Lance’s cheek bones. 

“You don’t though, do you? You don’t know that?” he said and Lance bit his lip, giving a small shrug. “Lance… I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?” Lance asked, brows furrowing. 

“I should have been more attentive.”

“You don’t need to worry about me, Shiro.”

“Of course I do,” Shiro said, shaking his head. “Lance, you… you saved Allura because you have feelings for her?”

Lance frowned, unsure of why that was relevant. “No…” he said softly. “I saved Allura because I care about her, and because she’s more important than me.”

“Oh, Lance,” Shiro said softly, cradling his face in his hands. “Would you say… that Pidge is more important than Hunk? Or that Allura more important than Keith?”

Lance bit his lip and shook his head. 

“No, because we’re a family, and we’re all as important as each other, and that includes you. If it’s a choice of who to save there is never an option, there is never a go to answer, and it is _never_ you.”

“Sentiment isn’t important, Shiro,” Lance said bitterly. “Everyone knows that purely for Voltron? I’m the expendable one, I’m the dumb one, I’m the one that fucks things up every time. That’s all on me.”

Shiro shook his head. “You don’t fuck things up more than anyone else, Lance. More bluntly, perhaps. Has Keith not fucked things up due to his hotheadedness and impulsiveness? Has Hunk not fucked things up because he hasn’t been able to stomach something? Pidge, because she’s been too invested in the technology of something? Allura because of what she stands for? Me? Because I don’t know how to handle things that I’ve been through, and that affects decisions I make _every day_?”

Lance looked down and didn’t say anything. 

“We all fuck up, Lance, we’re all stupid idiots in the right circumstances, but you pull through when we need you. I know that I can always rely on you. You are so valuable, Lance, you are so _precious_ , not just to Voltron, but to _us_.”

Lance looked back up at him with shining eyes, tears threatening to spill. “How can you say such nice things about me?” he asked, voice barely a whisper. 

“How can I not?” Shiro said, giving him a soft smile. “They’re all true. None of us would be able to do this without you, none of us would have ever been okay again if you’d… None of us.”

Lance was sure his cheeks were burning, not only from the compliments, but from the way that Shiro was still cradling his face - cradling him like he really was _so precious_ , like he was so so important. 

Lance searched Shiro’s eyes for a few moments, before tentatively leaning in and brushing his lips over Shiro’s, Shiro not making to pull back, only letting out a soft breath against his lips as he did so. 

“Thank you,” Lance murmured as he pulled back and Shiro looked at him, a mixture of wonderment and confusion on his face. 

“Was that… a thank you?” he murmured and Lance smiled. 

“It was a whatever you want it to be,” he said back and Shiro breathed a gentle laugh, slipping one of his hands into Lance’s hair and gently stroking against his scalp. 

“Can I want it to be something that you do again?” he asked, sounding almost afraid to. 

“If you like,” Lance said, giving a small nod, eyes falling closed as he met Shiro half way, their lips brushing together tentatively again, except this time, neither of them pulled back, just brought their lips together in gentle kisses again and again and again.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are greatly appreciated <3


End file.
